


Fix

by yeaka



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: F/M, Vignette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-11
Updated: 2018-10-11
Packaged: 2019-07-29 15:32:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16267109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yeaka/pseuds/yeaka
Summary: Amanda does her makeup.





	Fix

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don’t own Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency or any of its contents, and I’m not making any money off this.

None of her boys give a shit whether she wears makeup or not, she’s sure of that, but Amanda does her eyes up all in black for _her_ and nobody else. She likes her face better when she looks like a hot raccoon ready to tear someone’s face off. Paired with her hair and new jacket collection, it screams _punk_. And Amanda’s the punkest chick on the planet.

She’s padding on the eye shadow in the rearview mirror when she catches a glimpse of some other black where it doesn’t belong—a big, thick hair in the center of her chin. Instantly, she’s set the eye shadow down, hands jumping for a bigger problem. She grabs the mirror and tilts it, tilting her face too, then swears, “Fuck!”

“Now?” Martin sleepily asks, glancing over from the driver’s seat. He’s got it all the way reclined with his shoes on the dashboard. She’d thought he passed out, but apparently one word—when it’s the right one—is worth waking up for. She shakes her head.

“No, damn it, I’ve got a hair on my chin!”

“Join the club,” he chuckles, low and raspy from the burn of cigarettes. She punches his shoulder without really looking, and he switches to, “So?”

“So I don’t want it there. How much money have we got left?”

“Three dollaroos.”

That’s probably not enough. She stares at the offending hair for a few extra seconds, trying to formulate a cheaper plan of attack, but there isn’t one. It’s probably too much to hope that one of them has a waxing kit lying around. 

That leaves only one option. She twists around in her seat to address the back, where Gripps, Cross, and Vogel are bizarrely locked in deep concentration over the Pretty Princess board game they pulled out of the trash yesterday. She’ll never _fully_ understand them.

“Listen up, boys,” she starts, and all three of them snap to attention—she gets them _enough_. “Mama ‘Manda needs a new pair of tweezers.”

“No can do, boss,” Vogel chirps, turning out his pockets, like she expected a shiny pair to be in there.

Cross squints and repeats, “Tweezers?” like it’s a fantasy word she just made up.

Gripps points back at her and triumphantly announces, “I know those!”

Martin punches the ceiling and joins in, “Hunt’s on!”

Immediately, they’re all hyped up. Cross grabs a can of beer to chug as Gripps rips the door open, Vogel howling like a wolf on the prowl. In less than a minute, the three of them are spilling out, bats in hand, ready to scour the countryside in Amanda’s honour. When just Martin’s left, he looks at her, and she knows right away what he wants.

She wants to be perfect for him, and a prelude to a beard isn’t perfect. But he obviously doesn’t care, and her life’s a mess anyway. 

She tells him, “Let me finish my makeup first.” And he goes back to resting with a ready smirk while she finishes her badassery.


End file.
